“Let’s go out to dinner tonight,” my husband said suddenly.
I had pork chops defrosting in the sink. “OK,” I said.
We decided on a small local Italian restaurant. Miss P was beside herself. She had been cooped up all day and couldn’t wait to go out. When I pulled out her jeans, T-shirt, socks, shoes and pull-up she started chanting “Go go go!”
The restaurant was nicer than we expected for a strip shopping mall storefront. It wasn’t kid-friendly unless you count having high chairs as kid friendly. No kids menu, no smaller sized utensils. I fed her food from my plate, she drank my tea, she said “All done, let’s go, bye bye” a lot. And loudly.
“Use your indoor voice,” we said softly.
“OK,” she would whisper. The next words would be a shout:
ALL DONE. THE END. GO NOW.
She wanted ice cream but they didn’t offer it as a dessert option. The waitress told us about an ice cream shop several doors down. We walked down the sidewalk. Passed check cashing, a furniture rental store, a salon, a dollar store.
“Ice cream cone!” Miss P shrieked, delighted, as we stepped into the brightly lit shoppe.
Age two has no sense of urgency about ice cream cones. She isn’t being dripped on, daddy is. She wipes her strawberry covered face on his white T-shirt. It beings to rain softly. I can barely get the wet wipes out of their small foil containers.
As we walk back to the car, I take her left hand, daddy takes her right.
“1-2-3-whee” we lift her off her feet, swinging her forward over a puddle.
“Again! Do it again!” she pleads.
We do it again.
Nights like this, I can’t believe we almost missed out on being parents. Nights like this, I can’t imagine any more joy.
About a half hour ago she woke from her nap crying but I recognized it as the cry of “I am still tired” and that she would go back to sleep. For some reason her nap cycle is only about an hour long, but if I read her right I can occasionally get a two hour nap stretch out of her. I’m working on that today.
It’s November, nearing December, and I’m feeling the effects of S.A.D., even down here in sunny Florida. Life is actually going better than I had hoped, and yet there is some melancholy.
Finances are finally starting to loosen up for us after a wretched October. I snagged an amazing freelance writing opportunity that is keeping me busy in my non-mom time.
And now I’m thinking about the new year, and what that needs to look like. I think I spend too much time doing these three things:
- Playing Uno on the Kindle
- Playing Diner Dash on the Kindle
- Arguing in online forums
I want to stop spending “free time” in mindless pursuits. I mean, sure, every once in a while, but these days I’m being a bit obsessive about it, so my plan is to cut those things out entirely. Here’s what I’ve done so far:
- Deleted Diner Dash from the Kindle
- Deleted my Babycenter account
- Removed myself from a couple of mom groups on Facebook
I really need to just go ahead and delete Uno but I haven’t done it yet. I hope to do it in the next week or two, but if not, then I’m pulling the plug December 31. I’m also going to practice not engaging in posts on Facebook that I feel strongly about. I’m giving these things far too much head space.
Things I want to do more of:
- Fun activities with my daughter
- Writing, for fun and for profit
- Sleeping, where possible
I can do more of these things if I do less of the time suck stuff. Cold turkey is hard, but I’m up for the challenge.